essais
(Deanne word/definition)
French origin of the word “essays” meaning “to try, trial, attempt”
Self-proclaimed disclaimer: These are my thoughts. I know nothing.
Humans emotions are not mutually exclusive
 This time of year can be so damn full and social, but at the same time it can leave us feeling empty and alone.  There are wonderful magic and heartbreaking sorrow. There are rampant emotions and survival detachment....
It’s time to trust ourselves again
As kids, we learn that everyone else has the answers. The teacher has the right or wrong solution in school. There are stats and studies that tell you exactly what to eat and how to optimally move. There is the...
The Paralyzing Trap: Being Too Much AND Unworthy Of Love
Too passionate, too sensitive, too loving, too idealistic, too feeling, think too much, too sexy, too strong, too feminine, too masculine, too dreamy, too skinny, too fat, too hopeful, too logical, too hurt,...
We learn this lie from the world
We learn at a very young age what the world wants of us. We learn what behaviour is expected, encouraged, and praised. We learn what parts of ourselves are accepted. We learn what gives us the love we so badly want. And...
This bubble has burst
A bubble has burst and it’s this; The world teaches us we’re broken. Because by being broken we buy into this way of life that keeps those who are profiting, profiting. We learn our life-force is too much for this world....
There’s something in you that needs out
Heartbroken, I can't find as much beauty as I want in this world. And I think you have it in you. There's something in you that needs out. Because we get so caught up in the everyday life... We always have that last 5...
This idea is killing me and I want it to stop
When I was in university and out at a bar there wasn’t a single night that passed where I didn’t look around, when I *should* feel most young and alive, and think for a moment, "What’s the point of all this?" I hid my...
Liberate our secrets and ourselves
I've gone from running the My Empowered Body Campaign last year, transitioning to coaching both men and women to rise in love, feeling more expansive than ever before from working with my therapist... and something still...
A letter to my new lover
Dear lover, I can't remember the exact question you asked or how we got to talking about this, but in that moment it became so clear. You were lying there with your head in my lap, the darkness of the night opening our...
But you say you want all of me
I am all too aware of what the world wants of me. I know the role I've been given to play and I can easily put on a performance that pleases society. The script I’ve been given have words I’ve memorized to heart. Proper....
Protected: I’m learning to love you, dear body
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Protected: I was that girl on the subway last night… crying
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Protected: But I’ll never forget the way you looked at me
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Protected: You make it too easy to go back and too hard to go forward
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Protected: To the addicted searching for drugs to find a high or numb a pain
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Protected: won·der
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Protected: My word for 2018 is one I currently can’t say without resistance and judgment
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Protected: I pressed my breasts against his back to push the demons out of his heart
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Protected: We all have shadows and demons.
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Protected: What it really meant is I felt inherently flawed
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Protected: The phone call woke me up in the dark
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Protected: With all the “me too’s” circulating there’s a hot burning in my chest
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Protected: I feel bad for feeling bad sometimes
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Protected: This headless, scarred stomach? Hi, it’s me, Deanne!
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Protected: I don’t know what my heart aches for more…
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I’m one hungry woman
I'm one hungry woman. World, I listened to you for too long when you told me women shouldn't get too big. So, I felt bad for wanting more, ignored my body, and denied myself my desires. But I've started listening and...
Protected: There’s a big part of my story I haven’t shared with you
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Protected: What if…
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Protected: I’m afraid of hurting loved ones with my truth
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Protected: I went MIA to dive into my darkness…
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Protected: You know this thing called life?
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Protected: Dear body, Happy surger-versary!
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Protected: Our bodies are either too much or not enough. Not perfect = never enough.
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Protected: Our bodies are the easy part…
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